How did you celebrate your birthday?
Sat in Frankie and Benny’s alone, slurping a choco-nana shake while desperately trying to catch the waitress’s eye, who appears to be ignoring your further requests of service. Perhaps she was put off by the nervous way you ordered your shake, after all it came across as more ‘troublingly psychotic’ then charming. Perhaps she fears that the damaged loneliness exuding from every sweaty pore of your being will somehow infect her joyful existence. Perhaps it’s because you’re a 35 year-old man sat alone in Frankie and Benny’s, drinking a child’s milkshake while wearing a party hat.
Either way, you don’t celebrate your birthday as good as David Bowie does, who on the day he celebrates his 69th year on Earth (roughly equivalent to 37 years on Mars), he will release his brand new album ★. Try asking for that in your local Virgin Megastore! Oh right yeah, you can’t.
As a taster for his 26th studio album (roughly equivalent to 14th Mars album), Bowie released its 10 minute title track late last night, and here’s the mildly disturbing music video directed by Johan Renck…
Surely everyone will now be wearing filthy bandages around their eyes with beady little holes poked in them, just as they were lightning-bolting their faces in the 70s. He’s such a trend-setter!
The single above definitely shows that Bowie is heading towards the more avant-garde jazzy direction of last year’s one-off single ‘Sue (Or in the Season of Crime)’ rather than the more straight-up serious rock of previous album The Next Day. The announcement of which came as a massive surprise on Bowie’s 67th birthday in 2013.
Again, Bowie: better at birthdays then you are. Now quick, get to the Cineworld before your afternoon showing of The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part II starts.
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