This is a weekly round-up for those people who would punch someone for saying “don’t judge a book by its cover”, or its film derivative, “how can you judge a film when you haven’t even seen it?”
Obviously everyone judges everything based upon first impressions. No one goes into a book shop, closes their eyes and picks a random book to read. That way they would come out with a James Patterson book (the man is prolific). People need a jazzy cover and a synopsis before they can make an informed decision about spending their money.
The same goes for new movie releases and their trailers. Trailers are the ‘cover’ to a film, they’re designed to capture and deliver a film’s essence in just a couple of minutes. And that’s what I’m doing here, expressing my first impressions on upcoming films based solely on their trailers. Yes like some horrible philistine.
The Assassin
This looks good! The Assassin has been surrounded by a lot of buzz and it’s easy to see why. What is difficult to see in the trailer however is a clear plot, but it is beautifully shot and has definitely piqued my interest. Although the American marketing intervention of ‘BETRAYED BY HER FAMILY’ ‘LEFT IN EXILE’ makes it sound like an intense episode of Jeremy Kyle, which it obviously isn’t….
The Fifth Wave
Sad that the Hunger Games franchise has ended but even sadder that it didn’t feature Katnip Hebrides fighting an alien invasion? Well The Fifth Wave is for you. The film looks like the 10 plagues of Egypt repackaged and contracted for the 21st century. Aliens invade Earth and decide to attack the planet in five stages, inevitably at the heart of the plot is Chloe Grace Moretz’s character who goes from carefree schoolgirl to Rambo when her brother disappears (seriously it’s like she flicks a switch). Can’t wait to watch it and forget all about it before the credits roll.
Ride Along 2
Not going to lie, I haven’t seen the first one (I moved right along, one might say) and this just looks like lots of Ice Cube frowning while Kevin Hart recites some old bits of stand-up. Some of the scenes in the trailer do suggest the occasional gag could be laughed at un-ironically. But I’m probably wrong.
The Big Short
This looks fine? I don’t really understand how The Big Short was nominated for Best Director and Best Picture Oscars but Carol was overlooked. It looks like a more sensationalised version of the excellent Margin Call. A part of me thinks it was nominated because it has Ryan Gosling, Brad Pitt, Steve Carell and Christian Bale screaming at the banks for ruining the global economy, which is clearly the ‘in’ thing to do now, while a film about homosexuality and identity in 1950s America was just too edgy for the predominantly 60 year-old white men of the Academy. Still, those bankers are a bunch of shits though huh?
Our Brand is Crisis
It’s like the last two seasons of West Wing and HBO’s Game Change but set in South America! To be fair, this does look like it has a lot going for it, and by a lot I mean everyone’s favourite double-barrelled actor, Billy Bob! That man can do no wrong. The film looks interesting and Sandra Bullock has been choosing her recent films fairly carefully, and the trailer suggests this is not just a straightforward tale about winning, but something more complicated and therefore interesting. Unfortunately the reviews have all been pretty dire, so it goes to show, you can’t judge a… OH NO!!!
